Yesterday I had to say goodbye to my wonderful childhood friend, Nova. (German shepherd, border collie mix.)
We grew up together, my mom brought her home when I was only 4,5 years old (now I'm 16) and losing her felt like losing a sister, or a part of myself.
I'm still in chock, it all feels so unreal that you're not with us anymore.
Noone was sitting by the table today, asking for food.
Noone was there to give the spare food to.
I always saved the best parts of the meat for you.
(The best parts for a dog, anyway.)
I even made that black-white scarf for you.
I still remember when we were young, playing around in the snow. Every friday night we spent together, our whole family. You, me, my brother and my mom and dad.
Just a big, happy family.
I've never seen my mother cry so much.
I never even thought my dad could
My mother probably think I'm heartless, even if we both cried our eyes out yesterday, but I'm actually trying to be strong for her. She's a wreck since you left us... You really were like her shadow, following her whereever she went. You and I never really bonded that way, but I still loved you with all my heart. And I know you at least cared for me, when you put your paw in my hand when you used your last breath.
There was no other way. The vet could not save you. But I'm just glad that you didn't have to suffer to death, but fell asleep, peacefully, surrounded by your family of four.
The ones that really loved you.
Losing someone you've been living with for 11,5 years is never easy, especially when you grew up together, we were both pups when we met, heh.
But I'll try to not be sad that you're gone, but to be happy that a dog like you lived. For all the great times we had together.
I don't know when I will recover, if I ever will but...
I don't think I'll be drawing much... And if I do, it will probably be Nova.
I'm actually quite proud of the picture, and the speedpaint, I really did my best to let everyone know how loved you were, and still are.
There will never be another dog like you, I'll never get the chance to grow up with another dog, I realise that now, but to be honest, I couldn't have wished for a better childhood friend.
I can still hear your claws scratch against the floor at night. I know you're still here with us~
I wish you're in a better place now, not suffering from any pain. Just free. Let your wings carry you whereever you want to go, Nova.
20/01/2001 - 18/10/2012 - 16:15
(If you want to make art of her or something, I wouldn't mind. I'd be more happy than sad.
Her ref: [link]